Happy New Year from Dopey Katie, Big Head, Jazzy the Amazing Wiener and Maggie Monster aka Katie, Xena, Jazzy and Maggie.

Hey all ewe wiener peeps! Happy New Year 2012! Yesterday, Mom spent most of da day takin’ pikchurs of us for our “Happy New Year” kard. I tol Mom, “Look, I ain’t wearin’ no Mardi Gras beads ‘cuz I nos whut ewe haf to do to get ‘em! An besides, Mom, I wanna nos eggactly how ewe gots dem!” She tol me, “Look, little wiener, your Uncle Bernie got those beads for us and I don’t have a clue what he did to get them, but you probably don’t want to know!” I wuz shocked! Den again, it’s my Uncle Bernie an he’s my Papa’s dad, so it makes sense. Dey are all goofballs, but I luvs dem anyways ‘cuz dey be my family!

I haf been tinkin’ a lot about whut all dis “new year” stuff is about. Peeple haf been saying on Facebook dat 2011 was hard. Yeah, it wuz. But to be honest, I donut tink 2011 wuz any harder dan, say, 1914, 1929, 1939. All dos yeers had weally bad tings happen. In fact, if ewe look at history, jest about every yeer has sumthin’ bad happen in it.

Let’s face it, wiener peeps, bad tings happen no matter what da year.

If all we focus on is da bad, we’ll find it. Sure, it’s hard to see gud wen ur drowning in debt. Kan’t find a job. Or a loved one is in da hospital. Or ur heart has been broken. I remember a heartbreaking phone call I receeved a long time ago, anguish on da oder end, “I’ll never love again!” It wuz my Papa wen he wuz only eight yeers old. Well, he didunt akshully call me. He called my Mom. But she tol me about it.

Anyway, I digress.

Mom sed my poor Papa was brokenhearted. Third grade, eight yeers old, an he wuz never gonna fall in love again! Mom listened an twied to comfort him best she cud, all da while smilin’ on da oder end because she knew, surely, he would fall in love again, many times. He wud have his heart broken again, many times. An yet, he wud get up anoder day to do it all over again.

Why? Because der is gud in dis world. Ewe will win sum. Ewe will lose sum. Ewe will get jobs. Ewe may lose a job. Ewe will get ur heart broken. Ewe will swear never to fall in love again. Ewe’ll make friends. Ewe will lose friends. Ewe may even lose loved ones.

But ewe will never lose da memories ewe haf made. Ewe will never lose da moments ewe haf experienced dat fill ur heart. I tol Mom, “The good and the bad, it’s what makes us who we are.” She wuz shocked I typed right, but I tol her dat wuz an original WienerBites quote, so it needed to be right.

It’s true! Da gud an da bad, it’s whut makes us who we are. So embrace the bad an learn from it. Hold on to da gud for all it’s worth an store it up for dos rainy days. An remember, life happens. It’s up to ewe to decide whut to do wid it!

Happy New Year! I luv all of ewe!

Love,

Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

Merry Christmas from Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

On wid da show…!

It seems dat Christmas is fast approaching. For sum of us, dat’s a happy time, for oders, not so much. I wuz tellin’ Mom da oder day, “Ewe nos, Mom, der are still a lot of peeple dat donut haf jobs. An sum of dem donut haf very much money. Whut does dat meen for der wittle kids for Christmas?”

She tol me, “Well, Jazzy, it means for some folks Christmas isn’t going to be much fun. Sure, us older folks don’t care as much about gifts and stuff. But for the little kids, it’s going to be a sad time if there aren’t any presents under the tree.”

Mom wen on to tell me a story dat about my Great Grandpa. I never meeted my Great Grandpa, but frum whut I heer, he was an all right guy. Mom said, “You know, Jazzy, it’s not always about toys and presents. I remember when I was little, Grandpa told us a story. We were sitting down to Christmas dinner. The table was loaded full of food. It all smelled and looked so good, our mouths were watering! Then Grandpa said, with his voice breaking, ‘You know, I remember we were so poor, all we had for one Christmas was a ’possum that Dad went out and killed for us. And now, I look at all this food, and all of you sitting around this table, and I thank God for it. Yet I still remember that ’possum.’”

Mom sed der wusn’t a dry eye at da table wen he tol dat story. I wuz a wittle puzzled ‘cuz I didn’t get it. So I asked her to explain.

“Whut did he meen dat he still remembered dat ’possum, Mom?” I asked her.

She sed, “Jazz, what Grandpa meant is even though he was blessed with a table overflowing with food, even though God had blessed him throughout his life and brought him from his poor beginnings, he never forgot where he came from and the ‘gift’ of that ’possum for their meal. He never forgot how blessed he was each and everyday.”

An truth be tol, afer she explained it to me, der wuzn’t a dry eye on dis wiener either!

So I asked her, “Mom, whut can we do for da little kids dat maybe aren’t gonna get any toys or maybe donut haf any food for der Christmas dinner?”

And she sed, “Jazzy, we can make a difference. There are angel trees all around the place with lists of toys and clothes and stuff kids needs. There are food pantries and homeless shelters that desperately need more volunteers this holiday season to help all those who won’t have a nice Christmas like others will. There’s a lot of ways to help, you just have to get out there and find them.”

I tol Mom, “Ewe nos whut, Mom? I tink dat is a gud idea. Maybe whut we shud do is tell people da best gift dey can EVER give anyone is the gift of themselves. The gift of giving. The gift of helping sumone who’s down on der luck. The gift of a smile. Dat donut cost a ting! Dat’s whut we shud do, Mom! Tell people to volunteer an help oders!”

Mom sed she thought dat wuz a gud idea, too. I refrained frum tellin’ her I knowed it wuz a gud idea ‘cuz I thought of it. Figgered I’d better still stay on her gud side until Christmas is over or dat piece of coal might jest end up in my stocking!

So, all ewe wiener peeps, I want ewe to make me a promise. Help someone in dis coming yeer. Volunteer!

But most of all, remember da ’possum.

Merry Christmas to all of you!

Love,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

Dis time, I iz gonna be talkin’ about whut happens wen Mom goes to Tulsa an leefs me in charge! Mom wen to Tulsa da oder day an boy, did we haf a fine time! Click da icon below to find out whut happened…

Oh, an before ewe start sayin’ stuff like I shudn’t be dooin’ dat…I jest want to remind ewe dat I’m 8 whole yeers old, so technically I’m old enuff to do whut I want!

Anway, here’s my podcast!

WienerBites Episode 3
(iPhone/iPad users click album art to play; everyone else click the player below)

Isn’t dat about da funniest ting ewe’ve ever herd? I meen, Big Head has seriously gotta get a wittle smaller hed ‘cuz she wreaks disaster everywhere!

Well, all my wiener luvin’ peeps, it’s time for me to go have my evening snak. I’m hopin’ for ice cream, but knowin’ Mom, I’ll prolly jest get a piece of cheese or sumthin’!

Stay cool and tune in later for anoder episode!

Luv, Jazzy the Amazing Wiener!

Anyways, I thought it might be nice if I tol Katie’s birth story. See, I wuz almost 4 yeers ol when Mom brought Katie home. It wuz me an my broder, Grady, who lived here. I wuz in charge, like I always iz, an Mom didn’t even come ask me if I wanted a new puppy! She jest brought it home! Sheesh!

Well, Katie wuz sick. She looked all scrawny an ribs stickin’ out an everyting. I sed, “Mom, take it back! It’z defective! It’z contagious! It looks like it’z gonna croak any minute!” Mom sed, “Shh, Jazzy. This little girl has had a hard life already and we’re going to help her get better and give her a great new home.” I wuz totally disgusted Mom didn’t listen to my advice. But den she explained everyting about Katie. She sed she was born into a little of 12 puppies. Ten of da puppies got Parvo and died. One puppy didn’t get it. An Katie got it, but she survived. Dat wuz whut Mom said tol her she had to take Katie.

See, Mom’s oder Doberman, Tyler, gots parvo wen he wuz a puppy, too. An he survived. So Mom felt like it wuz a sign dat she shud get Katie. Now here’s da ting. See, da lady who had all des puppies…she called Mom up an sed, “I have a pup that you need to look at.” Well, Mom sed no. She cudn’t afford it right now. She didn’t need anoder dog. But da lady sed, “Just come look at her.” So Mom did an ewe nos how dat turned out! Da lady tol Mom she didn’t want no money for her, she wanted to gif Katie to her so she wud haf a good home.

So Katie comes home. She wuz barely bigger dan me! She wuz young an dumb. Grady took one look at her an sed, “Ewe haf got to be kidding me?!” Akshully, it sounded more like, “What the hell….?!” But dis is supposed to be a PG blog, so Mom tol me to cut da rest of da cusswords dat Grady sed.

So Katie fitted right in frum da beginning. I meen, she looked like me an Grady. Had da same colors an all. But boy, wuz she dumb! She runned round like a crazy dog haf da time! She barked at everyting! She ated everyting! Which made Mom haf to spend money ’cause she ated a bunch of tree limbs an it gaf her da runs like nobody’s business! Mom wuz not happy cleanin’ up all dat poo, I can tell ewe that!

She pestered Grady sumthin’ awful! She pestered ME sumthin’ awful! She tried to sleep in my bed! See her in da pikchur! Mom akshully let her do it, too. She sed I had to be nice ’cause Katie had a hard life. Whutever! I had a hard life, too! I meen, I wuz less dan one pound wen I wuz born, I wuz sick, an dey didn’t tink I wud make it either. But Mom seemed to forget all dat! She sed I had to play nice wid Katie an make her feel welcome. I made her feel welcome, all right! I bited her in da patootie every chance I got!

So, I asked Mom, “How did ewe come up wid da name Katie?” She sed it was after her favorite Star Trek character within a character. I wuz like, “Oh, God! Here we go wid da Star Trek stuff again!” See, I wuz named after Jadzia Dax from Star Trek Deep Space Nine. Egad! So, I hads to be polite an I sed, “Gee, Mom…tell me da story how ewe named Katie, pweeze?!” I wuz seriously weady to hurl, but figgered I better be nice if I wanted a treat. She said, “Well, Jazzy, I really liked Star Trek Voyager. And I liked the episode when they introduced Fair Haven, a holographic town. One of the characters in it was called ‘Katie O’Clair’ played by Captain Katherine Janeway, who just happened to be played by Kate Mulgrew in real life.” Note dat I am gaggin’ at dis point, but I tried to remain attentive an interested.

I may haf akshully passed out at sum point…

She continued, “So, since I have named all my Dobermans ‘Baron’ as the first part of their name and Grady’s last name was ‘O’Malley’ and that’s rather fitting for the little Irish village of Fair Haven, I’m going to call her Baroness Katie O’Malley. What do you think?”

I pulled myself from my stupor an sed, “Gee, Mom…whut an interesting story! Kan I haf a treat now?” I don’t tink she appreciated my sarcasm at dat point.

So the wittle skinny puppy became Katie. I quickly changed it to Dopey Katie because she acted so dumb on occasion! Plus it has a nice ring to it. Jazzy the Amazing Wiener. Dopey Katie. It’s appropriate!

Grady weally liked Katie, not dat he wud admit it to jest anyone. He tol me ‘cuz we wuz tight. He sed, “Ewe no, Jazz, I weally do kinda like da wittle whippersnapper.” Well, whut he akshully sed was, “Jazz, Katie is a pain in the ass, but I think she’ll turn out to be an okay Dobe. Continue the family line and all.” Again, Mom tol me to keep it kleen, so I bleeped out all da bad words!

Katie growed up to be a weally nice dog an I jest don’t say dat ’cause she’s like a hunnerd times bigger dan me. She donut let anyone mess wid me. She takes weally good care of me. Like, da oder day, Maggie Monster an Big Head (dat’s Xena the Pit Bull) were startin’ to play weally crazy on da couch in da living room. Katie wuz layin’ by Mom an she saw me headin’ towards da livin’ room. She growled at me an dat’s her way of tellin’ me it’z not safe in da living room. At first, Mom wud get onto her for doing it ‘cuz she thought Katie wuz beeing meen to me. But Mom finally figgered out dat wuz Katie’s way of warning me off ‘cuz she only did it when de oder girls were playin’ ruff. Dat’s purty smart, if ewe ask me. But if ewe tell her I sed she wuz smart, I will deny it forever! For a Doberman, however, she iz a purty smart dog. A heck of a lot smarter dan Maggie Monster an Big Head!

Katie gots into da modeling bidness wid me for Mom’s TylerDog Pet Greeting Cards. But I had to show her da ropes. I tol her, “See, Katie, ewe gots to wurk it like this. Refuse to pose until ewe get da treat. If ewe pose first, she will make ewe do all kinds of stuff before ewe ever get one stinkin’ treat!” Katie didn’t belief me at first, but den she saw how Mom wuz, so she tried it. But dat dumb Doberman wants to pweeze Mom so bad, she almost always furgets an doesn’t get as many treats as I do.

I also had to tell Katie, “Look. Ewe may be da new kid on da block, but I am da reigning sales queen at TylerDog. So, don’t tink jest ’cause ewe are a cute puppy an all dat ewe will take over my spot!” Da first yeer dat Mom sold Katie’s cards, she did purty good, but I still sold more dan she did. Now everytime Mom has a photo shoot, we fight to see who gets on da table first. It’s not fair ‘cuz Katie jumps up der an I can’t quite jump dat far! I tol her, “Next time ewe jump in front of me, ewe big dopey Doberman, I’m gonna bite ur foot off!” I even posted a blog entry showing how meen she kan be! Oh, wait…maybe dat wuz me beeing meen an baring my teeth. Well, nevermind!

So, anyway, happy birthday Dopey….uh…sweet Katie. I wish ewe many, many more!

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

Tucker wuz a weally kool cat. I meen, he didn’t act like a regular cat at all! He wud lay wid us, me an Grady, like a dog. He didn’t use no stinkin’ litter box. He wud go to da door like we did an do his bidness, den come wight back in! I meen to tell ewe, Tucker was all right!

Mom gots Tucker wen he wuz only 10 days old. A frend brought him to her afer finding him in da middle of da street. Poor Tucker didn’t even nos how to eat, so Mom had to bottle feed him fur weeks! She had to teech him jest about everyting! Mom only had Tyler den, I wuzn’t around yet. Tyler looked at Tucker like he was a bug! But dey got along all ok.

Den Mom gots Grady an dey ended up being best friends! Dey wud take naps together until Tucker wud bite Grady on da ear fur no reason! Grady wud jump up out of a dead sleep an look at him like, “Whut did ewe do dat for?!” Tucker jest smacked him wid his tail and sauntered off, swishing his tail back an forth. He’s my kinda cat!

One time, Tucker wuz out being an alley kat…ewe nos whut dat iz, right? He was prowling around. An he gots into trouble ’cause sum meen peeple locked him in a building. Mom cried an cried…she thought she’d never find him. I tol her, “Mom, donut wurry. Tucker will be all wight. God will help us find him.” An God did. A couple weeks later, Mom herd dis wittle bitty “meow” coming from down da alley, two houses over. She runned over der an he was locked in dis garage! She broked da door open, scooped him up and taked him home! Grady and Tyler were so happy to see him, dey kissed him! A dog kissing a cat, can ewe imagine?! Of course, wight after dey kissed him, they spitted for like an hour!

Okay…now if ewe done da math, I guess ewe haf figgered out dat I prolly wasn’t around when Tyler was alive…which meens dat I wudn’t haf been able to tell Mom dat it was gonna be all right ’cause God was gonna help us find him. Well, ewe iz right. I wasn’t here. But I nowed dat God wud help, so I thought it an sent it to her in a future thought. Yeah, dat sounds gud. Besides, me and God, we’re tight. Like, jest da oder day, I told God, “Hey, did you nos dat dog spelled backwards is God?” God looked at me, sorta like Mom looks at me quite often an He sed, “Um, Jazzy, I think it’s God spelled backwards is dog.” I tol Him, “Whutever!!!!” He jest sighed. He does dat a lot wid me.

But I digress…

Tucker was jest a weally kool cat. Mom wud take pikchurs of him an he wud jest pose like a pro…almost as gud as me! He will never be furgotten ’cause Mom made TylerDog greeting cards wid him on ‘em, too! So now everyone will nos whut a purty kitty Tucker was.

Tucker, I’ll miss ewe.

Love, forever, Jazzy.

So, guess whut Mom over at TylerDog did? She made me a calendar! Yep, dat’s right! I haf my own 2011 dog calendar featuring me, Jazzy the Amazing Wiener called Darling Dachshunds 2011 Calendar! Is dat kool or whut? Ewe kan haf ur very own 2011 Darling Dachshunds calendar by clickin’ on this link or da pikchur at right.

It’s got like 12 months of ME! Yep, dat’s right! Ewe can haf a full year of purty pikchurs of me gracing your wall. Now, I nos dat all ewe wanna run right out an buy lots of des for ur family an friends. Remember, Christmas is coming up and da more calendars ewe buy, da more treats I get! Oh, dat’s not da reason for Christmas gifts? Oops! I meen to say dat da more calendars ewe buy, da happier peeple will be…like me, of course!

I weally dink dat I look purty on da cover, don’t ewe? Dere are baby pikchurs of me in da calendar, holiday pikchurs, me rollin’ around on da grass pikchurs, an let’s jest face it, weally cute pikchurs ’cause I’m a wiener! Us wieners can’t help but take good pikchurs!

Mom also made one for Grady, even tho he isn’t wid us anymore. Mom needs to buy da 2011 version for herself ’cause she’s had da 2009 version hangin’ on da wall an I gets confused what doggone day it is! Sheesh, Mom, update it already, wud ya?! Here’s Grady’s calendar an link, too. He looks weally handsome an I miss him a whole lot!

Mom sed she is gonna wurk on more calendars for oder dog breeds an maybe a cat or two. I told her we didn’t need no stinkin’ cats, but she told me to hush ’cause lots of peeple like cats an we haf to be nice. I told her I didn’t haf to be nothin’ cause, after all, I am Jazzy the Amazing Wiener! She told me I say dat too much an ewe nos whut I sed, “Kiss my patootie, Mom!” She jest shaked her head an sighed. She does dat a lot around me! BOL! BOL!

Strut Your Mutt

Did ewe nos dat Mom is gonna take Dopey Katie an Monster Maggie to Strut Your Mutt? I iz so mad! I don’t gets to go ’cause Mom sed I bark too much! Well, whut am I supposed to do? Shake hands wid everyone? I’m a wiener! I’m little! If I don’t bark, peeple won’t see me an der day wud be ruined! Doesn’t she no nuthin’?!

Anyway, if ewe don’t haf anything to do on Saturday, November 6 from 10 a.m.-1 p.m. ewe kan go to Pathfinder behind the Bartlesville High School an join up wid everyone an haf a good time! It’s a fundraiser for Bark Park Buddies for a public dog park in Bartlesville (which I’m sure I don’t get to go to eider! Sheesh!). Admission is $5 per person an Mom sed dey wud haf contests, hot dogs (not me!), refreshments, an more kool stuff! Please, sumone go so I can at least haf a report of whut goes on at des fun events!

Well, all ewe wieners, I gots to go! Remember, love ur human ’cause dey needs it!

Luv

The Aloha Girls

Hey, all ewe wiener lovers! Yep, it’s me, Jazzy the Amazing Wiener! I’ve been takin’ an extra long summer vakashun as ewe kan see from my lapse of posting! Stop grumbling! A wiener’s gotta do whut a wiener’s gotta do!

I’m shure ewe noticed my weally hot pikchur above in my purty new bikini! I do look like one hot dog, don’t eye?! See, I’m gettin’ weady for a weally cool event called da “Dog Days of Summer Pool Party!” It’s gonna happy on Sunday, August 15th frum 6-8 p.m.

an my furry friends, da Bark Park Buddies, are going to host it along wid da Benevolent and Protective Order of Elks. I donut nos if dat meens der will be weal elks der, but it shud make for sum fun pikchurs!

Anyways, da pool party is gonna be at de Elks Lodge over at 1060 Swan Drive behind da Walmart in Bartlesville, OK. Dat’s where I lives. It costs $5 per dog and $2 per person to get in all da fun! Plus der will be hot dogs, a raffle, contests, an more! Man, I tell ya, it’s gonna be a weally gud time! I may be wittle, but I bet ewe I kan outswim any oder wiener out der!

Here’s a poster about da event…my Mom over at Tyler Creative made it. I taught her everyting dat she nos! She’s purty good, huh?!

Oh, an I’m not supposed to tell dis, but she is totally redesigning her Web site an also redesigning da TylerDog Cards web site wid a new store an everyting! I’ll tell all ewe about it first ‘for she does ’cause I am Jazzy the Amazing Wiener Who Knows All and Tells All!

So, back to da pool party…

Even tho I say dat Katie is dopey, she looks kinda cute in her bikini, too, don’t ewe tink? I tink dat we wud be da two cutest girls ever at da party!

So if ewe haf nuthin’ to do, come out to da Bark Park Buddies “Dog Days of Summer Pool Party” an party wid da hot dogs!

All my luv to my wiener fans!

Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

Wiener Wisdom #10: Beware of exploding Doberman Pinscher brains!

Beware! This Doberman puppy might grow up to have an exploding brain!

Okay, now dat might sound like a weally weird ting to type! But I gots to comment on dis simply ’cause Mom came home an told me about it. It made me laff so hard I thought I’d die! BOL! BOL! (For de uninitiated, BOL means “barking out loud!” See, us dogs haf our own online shorthand!).

Okay, da weason I typed dat iz ’cause of dis story dat Mom told me. She sed dat twice now she has been asked dis question by peeple who claims to be knowledgeable dog persons. Dey asked her if it was true dat de weason Doberman Pinschers attack der owners when dey get old (Myth #1), iz ’cause der brains keep growing in der skulls (Myth #2) an eventually der brains jest explode in der heads (Myth #3).

Mom sed wen she herd dis question, she was so stunned she cud hardly respond! I tol her dat it was prolly a gud ting I wasn’t der ’cause I wud haf had to slap des peeple silly! Come on peeple, let’s tink about dis! Mom sed I had to type da Myths correctly so it shows up in da search engines wight (whutever dat meens), so here goes…

Myth #1: Dobermans (or any dog for that matter) attack their owners when they get old.
False. If getting old means you get aggressive and attack, might want to avoid my Mom. She just turned 47 and will probably go Crazy Mad Dog on your patootie if age is a factor in aggression. Mom is a “red zone” case if I’ve ever seen one! (I wanted to type ass back there, but Mom said this is a G-rated blog. I told her to grow a pair!).

I digress…

Seriously, dogs don’t attack because they get old. Dogs, or any animal for that matter, can attack at any age, yes. And when they do, granted it’s terrible. But I go back to what I have always said: Train your dog properly and you will avoid situations like this. Most animals attack only when provoked. Now, before you email bomb me for that, I said most. Are some attacks unprovoked? Yes. Especially when dealing with unpredictable wild animals. But we’re not talking about Mom…I mean wild animals. We’re talking about dogs. Ultimately, it falls back on the human to train their dogs to be social and well-mannered, not Crazy Mad Dog like my Mom! Train your dogs, people, so they know not to chase the mailman or chew ankles off the UPS guy. You got ‘em. It’s your responsibility!

Myth #2: Dobermans (or any dog for that matter) brains continue to grow in their skull after maturity.
False! Does YOUR brain continue to grow to the point of exploding? Think about it! I won’t even go any further in dignifying this remark. You reach maturity, your brain does, too. Or at least one hopes it does. Some folks still walk around with an adolescent brain! Trust me, I’ve witnessed enough adolescent brains in grown-up folk, and I’m just a little Wiener.

Myth #3: Dobermans have a tendency to have exploding brains.
False. My Mom has owned Doberman Pinschers for 28 years and in those 28 years, she has yet to witness an exploding Doberman brain. On occasion, I have wished Katie’s brain would explode, especially after she chews on my head or thinks my back leg is a chicken leg! Otherwise, no exploding Doberman brains here.

Okay, I’m done typin’ korreckly.

Now, as much as I make fun of Dopey Katie an tell peeple she’s stupid an all, for a dog, she’s purty smart. Accordin’ to an artikle Mom wead to me, “Doberman Pinschers ranked #5 in a scientific study by psychology researcher Stanley Coren, based on an analysis of data from dog-obedience judges in the U.S. and Canada (Cesar’s Way magazine, April 2010, pg. 21).” Not bad. I’m rather ticked off, tho. Dey didn’t say nuthin’ about Dachshunds beein’ smart. I tink da results were wigged, I tell ya!

Anyway, next time sumone asks ewe if Doberman brains explode, ewe now haf all da information ewe need to enlighten dem…wight before ewe smack ‘em upside da head!

Buddy the Doberman Pinscher Mix

Speakin’ of Dobermans (guess dis is a Dobie day!), Mom has been wurkin’ wid a weally sweet Dobie mix named Buddy. Buddy was dumped at da Washington County SPCA. He was weally skeered at first. He wudn’t walk on a leash an did da Alligator Roll! He wud eat his leash, too! Mom started wurkin’ wid him an now Buddy walks like a champion! He also is learnin’ how to sit, down, an stay. Mom sed he loves to pway fetch, but mostly Buddy just loves to be loved. I tink dat I’m gonna start callin’ him Buddy Love! Here’s his pikchur…isn’t he handsome?

Buddy the Doberman reacts to the iPhone as it rings while taking his photo!

Der are so many wonderful animals available for adoption at the Washington County SPCA. Even if ewe don’t or kan’t adopt one, dey still need volunteers who will walk da dogs, love da kitties, an jest help out in general! One of my Mom’s hewmon friends has an group called GiveJust1. It talks about how if we all jest gave one day of service to help another, whut a wonderful world it wud be. Tink about it! GiveJust1!

An on dat note, I bid ewe adieu! Hugs and luv to ewe all!

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener!

Wiener Wisdom #9: April showers brings muddy paws!

I wunner if Mom will jest karry me everywhere?! I’m wittle, I don’t weigh dat much an shoot, she cud jest karry me like a football an den my wittle feets wud never haf to get muddy!

Yesterday, I watched Lily playin’ wid da soccer ball an man, was her face all muddy! I told Mom she shure wud look cute wid a Mia Hamm jersey on while she plays wid da ball. Lily was all like, “Huh? Did ewe say I get sum ham?” Poor Loopy Lily. She’s jest not weally bright, but I luf my pet! I tink she’s been hangin’ out wid Dopey Katie a wittle too much!

Mom in Cesar’s Way magazine

I haf sum gud news! I am weally proud of my Mom. Oder dan da fact she jest turned 47 on April 1st and is weally old (oops! I wasn’t supposed to say dat, was I?! ), she jest found out her photos were published in  a magazine called Cesar’s Way! Dat’s Cesar Millan, the Dog Whisperer. He has a weally cool magazine an her pikchurs are on pages 95 and 96, featuring Betty, Scrappy, and Kelly for a brand new series called “Adorable, Adoptable and Ready for Love.” Dey forgot to give her credit, so look for da pikchurs of da dogs she photograffed! Izn’t dat kool? I’m so proud of ewe, Mom! Here’s a link to da photos she taked.

I tink dat she tinks now she’s gonna be famous like me. I humored her an sed, “Oh, sure, Mom! Ewe will be!” She jest doesn’t unnerstand, tho. She is gud, no doubt. I meen, shoot. I taught her everyting I nos, so she bedder be gud! But I am amazing! I meen, der is a weason my name is Jazzy the Amazing Wiener!

All wight, wiener lovers. Dat’s all for now! Have a wunnerful Monday

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener!

Wiener Wisdom #8: Don’t mess wid a wittle wiener ’cause we gots weally sharp teeth!

Twust me, ewe do not wanna make dis wiener mad! Jest ask Katie! See dos teeth?!

Sheesh! Now I gots to go get a tweat or sumthin’ to calm down!

Wemember, if ewe wanna post, I’d luv for ewe to post, but if ur gonna spam, we’re gonna bite ewe in da patootie!

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener