Hey, all ewe wiener lovers! Are ewe weady for New Year’s Rezolushun #2 yet? Here we go…

New Year’s Rezolushun #2: Keep ur nose kleen!

Regal-looking, izn’t it?!

Now, ewe might ask, whut eggactly does “keep ur nose kleen” haf to do wid New Year’s Rezolushuns? An no, it’s not boogers! Let me tell ewe…

See, us dogs do everyting wid our noses! Wen we’s born, we can’t see or hear nuthin, but we can smell. It’s de only ting dat weally works on us, so everyting we do is tied into our noses. We nos our Momma by our nose, we nos where da milk is by our nose, everyting!

As we get older, our noses can sumtimes get us into trouble! For eggsample, wen I smells sumthin’ weally gud, I tells Katie about it an she normally will wun into da kitchen to see whut it is. Of course, dis meens jumpin’ up on da counter to see whut Mom cooked, which meens dat Mom will yell at her to get off da counter an den she gets into trouble! So, maybe I shud rephrase dat: my nose can get Katie into trouble! ha ha ha!

Sorry, I digress. I kan’t help but be meen to Katie sumtimes. It’s just part of who I am. An evil wittle wiener! 🙂

Anyway, I meens, how many of ewe haf been out walking wid ur dogs an suddenly dey get a scent of sumthin’ an da next ting ewe nos, ur hangin’ on for dear life as ur dog takes off afer da scent? Oh, ewe nos it happens. I see dogs walkin’ der peeple by my house all da time!

Whut I meen to illustrate wid des stories is dat sumtimes our noses go where dey don’t belong. An da same ting cud be sed for hewmons. Sumtimes I see hewmons stick der noses in places I wouldn’t even put dem (like near Lily’s butt for one!)!! Hewmons don’t tink sumtimes, dey jest stick der noses in, sniff around, an da next ting ewe nos, dey is in trouble! Why do ewe tink dat da news is so full of bad stuff all da time? It’s because peeple are stickin’ der noses in where dey don’t belong.

Who am I to make dis kind of broad pronouncement, ewe ask? Well, for one, I am Jazzy the Amazing Wiener an I pays attenshun to a lot of stuff. Tink about it. Peeple start wars all da time. How comes? Normally ’cause sum dodo head decides he’s gonna stick his nose over in his neighbors land and decide he wants it. Da whole “grass is greener…” ting! Peeple get divorced a lot an how comes? A lotta times ’cause one person sniffed anoder person an thought dat dey smelled bedder dan their old person at home! Peeple gets mad at der neighbors. How comes? Most of da time ’cause dey stick der noses in where dey don’t belong, gossip, an make each oder mad.

Why all dis stickin’ noses in where dey don’t belong? Why all da fighting and gossip and sniffin’ places ewe shudn’t? What happened to being honest an trustworthy an mindful of oders? I tink a lot of times dat we forget dat da Good Book says dat we’re supposed to do to oders whut we wud like dem to do to us.*

Whut dis meens is, if ewe want sumone to treat ewe well, den ewe shud treat dem well. If ewe do dis, does it meen it will happen? Nope. Der are a lot of times dat ewe can be weally nice to peeple an dey still will treat ewe like…well…a dog. Does it meen dat ewe shud be mean back to dem? Nope. It meens dat ewe shud still twy to be good to dem. Why, ewe ask? ‘Cause it’s da right ting to do. Ewe never nos whut sumone else is going thru. Maybe dey are going thru a weally hard time or dey are sad or scared or alone. An maybe, jest maybe, ewe being nice to dem will be da one bright spot dey haf in der day. Maybe dey won’t show how much it meens to dem and maybe dey might jest not be nice back. But ewe will haf shown love to sumone who desperately needs it. An weally, isn’t dat whut it’s all about anyway? Love? It’s whut it shud be about.

See, love kan change da world. Ofer 2,000 years ago, da love of one Man changed a world condemned to sorrow. “Well, the world is still pretty sorry…” ewe might say. Yeah, in many aspects it is, I agree. Der are wars, an kids goin’ to bed hungry at night, an millions of animals beeing killed each year, an sick peeple gettin’ sicker. Der is a lot of sadness in da world.. Yep, you’ll find sadness and sorrow…if dat’s whut ur lookin’ for.

But there’s a lot of beauty and goodness in da world, too. Peeple who twy an make a difference in da lives of oders, not because dey hope for fame or fortune, but only because it’s da wight ting to do — des are da beeutiful. Everytime I watch da TV an I sees peeple like da CNN 2009 Heroes or da peeple who are stuck on da front lines defending our freedoms or da peeple who do da dirty jobs dat no ones wants. Tink about it. Der are beeutiful peeple in da world, helping oders every single day an most of da time, dey never get recognized for whut dey do. Dey jest do it because dey haf hearts full of love an dey want to help.

Back in August, da first time dat my Mom went out to da Washington County SPCA to take pikchurs of da homeless dogs an cats, she cried like a baby. She walked past a whole pack of puppies an one of dem had a sign on it’s cage dat sed, “Going home!” Ewe wud tink dat wud make her happy, an it did, but it also made her realize dat for sum of dem, dey wud never get to no a loving home. So dat was wen Mom decided dat she wud keep takin’ der pikchurs for as long as it takes until every single one of dos dogs an cats haf signs dat say “Going home!” Dat’s whut I’m talkin’ about…hearts full of love dat want to help!

So, I want ewe to tink about dat as we gets weady to leaf 2009 an head into a new decade for 2010. Is ur nose in da wight place? Are ewe keepin’ it kleen? Are ewe weady to sniff out new opportunities to make tings bedder dis year?

I’ve given ewe four great rezolushuns so far:

New Year’s Rezolushun #5: Be nicer to Dopey Katie!
New Year’s Rezolushun #4: Take more naps!
New Year’s Rezolushun #3: Stop an smell da roses!
New Year’s Rezolushun #2: Keep ur nose kleen!

An if ewe comes back tomorrow, ewe will gets to find out whut my New Year’s Rezolushun #1 will be!

On dat note, I want to wish ewe a safe and Happy New Year! Do sumthin’ different dis year…share sum love!

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

*Luke 6:31

Hey, all ewe wiener lovers! It’s time for New Year’s Rezolushun #3. Are ewe ready?

New Year’s Rezolushun #3: Stop an smell da roses!

Hmm, smells like chicken!

Now, if ewe wead my blog post from yesterday, ewe nos dat I talked about how it seems dat all hewmons do is run around doing all kinds of tings, but sumtimes it seems like dat’s all ewe do: run around. But ewe haf to ask urself: are ewe weally happy wunning around all da time?

See, my point (an I do haf one!), is dat sumtimes it’s more important to stop wunning around an take a moment to breathe. I meen, look at us dogs. Whut is one of da first tings dat we do wen we go outside? Well, afer barkin’ an dooing our bidness….we throw our heads back, put our noses into da air, and sniff. Why? Well, if ur standing by Lily, dat might not be a gud ting ’cause she lets stinkers! But most of da time, it’s ’cause we wanna “see” whut’s going on. Dat’s how us dogs see stuff: we take time to sniff da world around us. An we learn a lot: who’s been in our yard, whut’s going on down da street with Pumpkin Pie, da Old English Sheepdog, an all kinds of tings!

Hewmons, on da oder hand, sumtimes get so bizzy dat dey miss some of da beauty around dem. Like Mom, she sumtimes gets worried about stuff. I hears her talkin’ to Mamaw a lot (hey, it’s not eavesdroppin’ if ur lyin’ in ur bed next to da phone!) an dey talk about de economy. Dey talk about Mom’s bidness. Dey talk about how meen peeple seem to be these days. Shoot, Mom’s iPhone goes off like 10 times a day wid “Braking News” alerts from CNN an not one of dem is ever gud news, so dey talk about dat, too.

Sumtimes, I jest wanna tell Mom, “Hey, Mom? Yeah, all dat stuff might be true. But at da same time, haf ewe went outside an seen how purty da sky looks? Did ewe see how da snow glistens wen da sun hits it? Haf ewe looked into my gorgeous brown eyes an seen how purty I am?” I meen, come on peeple! We are surrounded by a wealth of beautiful tings everywhere. An like I sed yesterday, why worry? It don’t do nuthin’ except rob ewe of good energy ewe cud haf used for today!

See, us dogs, we gots it right. Jest like I sed yesterday, we don’t fret over da past, we don’t worry about da future, we lives in da now. We nos how to stop an smell da roses, to appreciate da wittle tings around us. An no, dat wasn’t a wittle wiener joke! The Good Book sed dat da birds don’t worry about sowin’ or reapin’ but yet God feeds dem. An if He feeds dem, den surely we are much more important dan da birds, wight?* (No offense to any of my feathered friends! 🙂

Wen it comes wight down to it, it’s da wittle tings dat matter. Seeing ur grandbaby’s first smile or watching da sun come up over the hillside. Watching puppies play in da snow or the wonder in a child’s face da first time dey see a snowflake. Helping dat stranger on da side of da road when it’s pouring rain outside an no one else will stop to help. Des are da kind of tings dat matter. Not gettin’ dat new 60-inch flat-screen (altho dat wud be nice, Mom! I cud watch all da Dog Whisperer episodes frum my bed!), or worryin’ about wether ur portfolio is gonna go up or down. Sure, we gots to plan for da future. But we don’t haf to worry about da future. It won’t change it, no matter how much we worry. In fact, the Big Guy upstairs sed, “Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own.”*

So, for me, I tink dat I am gonna stop an smell da roses a wittle bit more dis year (tank God we don’t haf a boy dog anymore! Dat cud be dangerous! hee-hee). I tink dat I am gonna find sum of da wittle tings in life an appreciate dem more ’cause wen it comes wight down to it, it’s weally de only tings dat matter.

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

*Matthew 6:25-34

Hey, all ewe wiener lovers! I’m back wid my top five New Year’s Rezolushuns. Weady for #4?

New Year’s Rezolushun #4: Take more naps!

Dis is da life!

See, wen hewmons are wittle kids, dey haf to take naps. Even wen Mom went to kinnergarden like a hundred years ago, she sed dat she had to take a nap everyday! So I ask ewe, how comes wen hewmons grows up dey don’t take naps? How come it is all dey do now is rush around all da time, twyin’ to fit in everyting…even sum tings dat aren’t weally important?! An all da time, dey are tired, tired, tired! I tells ewe whut, when I take a nap, I wake up refreshed an weady to bite Katie! Um…did I jest type dat? I meant, I waked up refreshed an weady to go! 😉

I tink dat der are lots of tings hewmons shud do dat dey don’t do jest ’cause dey are all grown-up. I meen, look at it frum my perspective as Jazzy the Amazing Wiener! Okay, okay, look at it frum da perspective of a dog. We haf jobs. Sure, most of us don’t get out an punch clocks, but we patrol da yard, we bark an let our hewmons nos sumone is at da door, we protect our pack and we luv our hewmons. But at da same time, we make sure to take time each day to play. We take naps. We gets up, we stretch, we go out an run da yard, we eat, we play, we nap, an den we do it all again. An we’re happy! We don’t worry if Princess da Poodle has a new collar or if Ralph the Beagle gots a new dog house! We is jest happy to be!

How comes all hewmons do is worry an feel stressed all da time? I tink it’s ’cause dey haf forgot how to “just be.” Dogs don’t fret about da past, we don’t worry about da future. We live for now. I like to tink dat da Big Guy upstairs is takin’ care of everyting, so why shud I worry about it? I wead a quote sumwheres dat said, “Every evening I turn my worries over to God. He’s going to be up all night anyway.”*

I like dat. I figure if I worry all da time, I wudn’t haf time to pick on Dopey Katie, let my pet Ms. Lily clean my ears, take naps, or do any of da tings dat I like to do!

So, on dat note, I’d like to gif ewe a wittle bit of advice frum da wurds of a weally famous hewmon: ” To be or not to be?” I’d say “just be.”

Luv,
Jazzy the Amazing Wiener

*Quote by Mary C. Crowley

Hey, all ewe wiener lovers! Dis iz Jazzy the Amazing Wiener coming to you wid her “Top 5 New Year’s Resolutions!” Actually, I spell it resolushun, but Mom sed da search engines might not understand dat. Oh, phooey!

I decided for da next five days, I’ll do my top five. So, for my very first one, here it is:

New Year’s Rezolushun #5: Be Nicer to Dopey Katie

Hey all ewe wiener lovers! Merry Day After Christmas! I nos dat it’s been awhile since I’ve had a chance to blog. Mom keeps sayin’ she’s bizzy, but whut is more important dan me getting to blog, I ask ewe? Nuthin’! Nuthin’ I tells ewe!

Well, lots has happened since we last talked. Wemember how wittle Lily’s puppies were? I called dem The Squeakers ’cause all dey did was squeak!

The Squeakers

Well, dey all growed up now an haf new homes! Here’s der new pikchurs. Aren’t dey cute?

Penny, Jake and Lily

Dey gots weally gud homes, too. One of dem is living with a great family an a cat named Badger. Dat wud be Penny, da girl. Da boy, Jake, is living with a great family with two big Akitas! He has a really gud time telling da big dogs whut to do!

Before dey left, Mom taked der Christmas pikchur. Here it is…

Merry Christmas from The Squeakers

Mom sed da pikchur is going to be published in sum book. Soon as I find out, I’ll let ewe nos. I haf to admit, I miss da little boogers. Jake did gets to come back for vacation an he had a weally gud time. He remembered wight off da bat dat I’m still da wiener-in-charge, but I letted him sleep in my bed wid me anyway. Katie was happy, too. She gots to eat his hed for awhile instead of mine! Lily was thrilled! She pwayed wid her boy a lot an nearly wore herself out!

Mom taked our pikchurs for Christmas, too. Here’s our Christmas kard. I tink dat I look completely silly in my hat and I nos dat Katie looks completely silly. As for Lily, she looks kinda cute, but I do tink she let a stinker!

Merry Christmas from Jazzy, Katie, and Lily

I did tell Mom whut da captions shud be. I’m a pretty gud writer, I tink! Also, I tink for next year I’m gonna direct da photo shoot so I gets a bedder pikchur.

Did I tell ewe dat I gots my own WienerBites Facebook page? Yep, I do. So, now if ur on Facebook, ewe can become one of my fans. Mom sed since so many peeps asked for it, she wud set it up for me. I said, “Well, it’s about damn time!” She tol me dat I shudn’t cuss. An I told her she shud kiss my patootie! I tink I might get in trouble for dat one! Oh, well…when am I NOT in trouble?!

Well, dat’s about all da Christmas news. Da weather here in Oklahoma is frightful an I’m weady for it to go melt an go away ’cause it’s cold on my wittle paws. Oderwise, I’m jest waiting for 2010 to start ’cause I nos it’s gonna be a great year! Plus, my birfday is January 20, for all of those who want to remember and maybe send me card or gifts! Treats are always welcome!!!

Well, all ewe wiener lovers, I tink dat it’s time for my afternoon nap. I luvs all ewe all an hope dat ewe had a very Merry Christmas! See ewe soon!